Do Not Move Off The Sidewalk Challenge: Holding Your Space in A White World

HANNAH DRAKE 628 said

 "Last year, I was in the airport on the rolling walkway with clear directions posted before stepping on the sidewalk to ‘stand on the right or walk on the left.’ There was a White man in front of me that disregarded the sign and stood in the middle of the rolling walkway preventing anyone from passing him. 

Behind me, I could hear someone approaching, and I turned around and saw a middle age Black woman walking briskly with her rolling suitcase flying behind her. I pressed myself and my luggage against the side rail to move out of her way and allow her easy access to pass me. She whizzed by me and in front of her was the White man, oblivious that she was behind him and in an apparent rush. 

He never turned around, never moved and never once thought that others behind him might need to pass. While I would like to say the Black woman, leaped over him, luggage in tow in a single bound, she stopped dead in her tracks. She never said a word. She never politely tapped the man on the shoulder to say, “Excuse me, may I get by you?” She just accepted that he was not going to move and for some reason even though she was in an apparent rush, she made a choice not to ask for him to cede the space for her to pass. She waited for the rolling walkway to come to an end, waited for him to saunter off the walkway then immediately took off in a sprint heading towards her gate. That small interaction stayed with me my entire flight...

I am not talking about ordinary, everyday courtesy we extend to others for often apparent reasons....

I am talking about Black people, particularly Black women and People of Color being cognizant of how they navigate throughout spaces making accommodations for White people and White people having an expectation that Black people or People of Color must navigate their bodies to allow White people access in spaces. This is more than someone being rude; this is about White people feeling as if Black bodies should accommodate them in spaces and if we do not, it is seen as the Black person being rude, unpleasant and intimidating..."

READ MORE: https://writesomeshit.com/2018/07/12/do-not-move-off-the-sidewalk-challenge-holding-your-space-in-a-white-world/ 

I have had to consciously stop myself from moving when a white person, usually a woman, is coming at me while looking right through me. That is, I have literally had white women look me in the face and keep walking without the slightest movement to one side so we can BOTH pass in a limited space.

If I am truly awake and paying attention --and I'm not always-- I either mirror the white person's movements and we bump shoulders OR if she doesn't make an effort to share space, I don't either and we bump shoulders, half-bodies much harder. A white woman damn near fell last month when I just stopped and waited for her to hit me. She barely mumbled an apology but she looked at me like I was a chair that suddenly appeared in her way.

I'd say her mind was elsewhere but this looking right at me and hitting me thing ONLY happens with white people, and mostly white women.

Last week a white man quickly zigzagged past me to get to sales counter to pay for some items when we were both clearly standing on a single line. I didn't make a scene or call him back because I didn't want to go to jail or have to pretend to not see the n-word look on somebody else's face.

The black woman, who had called me to the counter, waited on him instead of me because he was physically blocking me at this point. She looked at me apologetically as she began to ask him for payment. When I got to the counter neither of us said anything because this is our "normal."

I work around black, white, asian, and latino people daily and this pretty much ONLY HAPPENS to me with white people.

And I am not talking about the person who was deep into their own thinking and didn't see me. I'm completely serious when I say I've had white women look me in the face and keep walking toward me as if they cannot see me.

Don't get me wrong. It's not happening every minute. Most white women behave normally. And there are some who go way too far out of their way to hold a door for me, making a production out of it. But the "ignore your existence thing" happens to me too many times per year for it to be anything but racial. The other thing that let's me know this is real and not paranoia is that it's happening to so many other black women too. Years ago, I had another incident that was more blatant when visiting a friend down south.

I moved to one side to let a white woman pass down a narrow aisle in a store. She stood behind her cart pretty much staring me down.  

It took me a minute to understand what was going on. I was actually confused. The look of hatred she was giving me made me wonder if I'd taken her parking spot out in the lot or something. But the intensity of her look finally made it click in my head: stepping to one side wasn't enough. That annoyed look on her face was her wanting me to move -- even though I'd only just moved to that particular location seconds before.  

When I figured out she wasn't going to squeeze to one side in order to pass or say "excuse me" so she could get what she wanted, I straightened out, planted my feet shoulder width. I gave her a slight smile. My friend, with her own cart, was passing behind the woman as this staring contest was going on. When she saw what was going on she froze too, looking at the white woman from behind.  

Never seeing my friend, the white woman sneered and moved off. I went back to looking at whatever I was looking at for approximately 1 minute, maybe even less, than went to catch up with my friend.

The most amazing thing about this story is this: Later I realized that my friend (who is also black) and I never discussed the incident We didn't say anything about the white woman, even though we were alone in the store --except for the clerk and a couple of women at the opposite end of the store. We didn't discuss it in the car either. Later I realized we didn't discuss it because this is our normal as black women. White people expecting us to move and beg and plead for basic acknowledgment is our normal. I handled the woman's stupidity without incident, mostly, so there was nothing to discuss.

But there is something to discuss. We, as black women, need to discuss how we stop moving out of people's way. So I say black women should take this proposal of Hannah's seriously. I am already sort-of doing the "SIDE WALK CHALLENGE."

I am already making an effort to only move as much as the white woman coming at me. I am no longer making the same assumption over and over and over -- that the white woman is just busy in her head and unconscious. I AM assuming that I am NOT being paranoid then further assuming that I deserve the basics of respect.

If we don't make eye contact as we enter limited space, I'll say "excuse me" to wake her up. If that doesn't work -- and it has NOT-WORKED multiple times-- I'll let our shoulders or bodies bump. As I'm a fairly solid person and also mentally prepared to take the blow, she'll fall before I will. So I say, let the games continue. What do you say? BLaCKCHiCKRoCKeD.BLoGSPoT.CoM